


Helicarrier's Kitchen

by MrProphet



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, cookery
Genre: Gen, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-24
Updated: 2014-03-24
Packaged: 2018-01-16 21:45:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1362847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrProphet/pseuds/MrProphet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff"><p>The Avengers belong to Marvel. This chef is entirely unrelated to any real-life sweary celebrity chefs.</p></blockquote>





	Helicarrier's Kitchen

“What the fuck is this supposed to be?” the Chef demanded. “You’ve taken a poor, unsuspecting tabbouleh and smothered it in almond! The only excuse would be if you were trying to hide the taste of cyanide!”

Black Widow maintained a diplomatic silence.

The Chef moved on to the next table. “And what do you call this, Stark? You’ve messed up the presentation, the texture, the aroma… I think you’ve fucked up so many elements of this dish that you must have invented a few new ones.”

“Loki, Loki, Loki; I like what you’ve done with the presentation, but this is only half done. When you’re cooking meat from frozen, you’ve got to leave it to thaw.”

“And… What is this? It’s just a huge pile of fucking potato. What the fuck do you call that?”

“Hulk’s mash!”

**Author's Note:**

> The Avengers belong to Marvel. This chef is entirely unrelated to any real-life sweary celebrity chefs.


End file.
